tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post8142685139774381960..comments2023-04-02T02:34:26.581-06:00Comments on IRL*in real life with Jamie Jo: Speaking of Missy's OVARIES.... (a.k.a. "How Annoying is Your Fish Bowl?")Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-59312462409100651482012-09-21T06:33:14.491-06:002012-09-21T06:33:14.491-06:00It sounds like her mother-in-law is understanding ...It sounds like her mother-in-law is understanding about it, but I'm not sure she's been able to encourage Missy in any specific way regarding how to handle the advice and assistance people.<br /><br />The prayers are really appreciated, I'm sure!Jamie Johttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04168408977811339924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-81577405870150941432012-09-21T06:30:35.909-06:002012-09-21T06:30:35.909-06:00(((Tricia))) So sorry for the painful journey lif...(((Tricia))) So sorry for the painful journey life has taken you on, too. May you find comfort and wisdom in your situation, too. Thanks for reminding Missy that she is not alone.Jamie Johttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04168408977811339924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-20159515332309381362012-09-21T06:28:30.365-06:002012-09-21T06:28:30.365-06:00Well said, Beth from Mexico. Thank you! I had to...Well said, Beth from Mexico. Thank you! I had to smile about the other cultural differences like ice water (!), wet hair, etc. What about the hot-cold thing? Can't iron after washing in cold water. Mercy! You are so right about not trying to convince people that what they have always believed is simply not so.<br /><br />I love the idea of turning the awkward situations into opportunities to show Christ. Yes! That's how He uses all our stories - good and bad.Jamie Johttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04168408977811339924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-79389740011441347642012-09-21T04:30:18.126-06:002012-09-21T04:30:18.126-06:00She's in a hard place. I think a stock answer...She's in a hard place. I think a stock answer that she can use and reuse as often as necessary can be helpful. Something along the lines of: "Nope, no babies yet. In God's timing!" with a subject-change at the ready. <br /><br />With regards to conveying her higher sense of privacy and modesty - I think this is the bigger issue. Does she have in-culture women she can take aside and explain the cultural difference re. privacy on our fertility and how hard she is finding this? And then enlist their help in blocking all the well-meaning conversation and assistance?<br /><br />(((hugs))) to Missy. I've just yarped that she will have peace in the midst of this, knowing that our Father has her fertility - and relationships with those around her - completely in His hands.Lillypillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08011133900514034690noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-21113689017181186842012-09-21T01:48:11.240-06:002012-09-21T01:48:11.240-06:00This is tough, and having struggled mightily with ...This is tough, and having struggled mightily with infertility, I can say I would not have handled this well at all. I totally didn't want to talk about it except with our closest friends because it was so very painful. I don't have any good advice for your friend... maybe she should just break down sobbing and run from the room. That's probably what I would have done in her situation. :-) Hugs to her. - TriciaAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-25167376897497692992012-09-20T21:19:22.817-06:002012-09-20T21:19:22.817-06:00One thing she cannot say is that she doesn't c...One thing she cannot say is that she doesn't care if fertility is delayed, even with the caveat of "as long as God is in charge." Sometimes the culture just can't handle those things. Even here on a much lower level, I've learned not to try to explain viruses and germs to people when they freak out about me drinking ice water or getting wet or going somewhere with wet hair. The ice water thing I do in the privacy of my home, joking with my family about not telling the neighbors. The others, I give them some accepted "cure" I will do when I get home and, since I don't get sick, they think that took care of it. <br /><br />They just can't handle that the "story of their lives" is plausible but not true. These are things they have been told all their lives and just can't see it any other way. They also have a really hard time letting go of the wives-tales even if intellectually they know them to be wrong.<br /><br />All that being said, one way to deal with it (if these people are believers) is to turn it around on them. Begin with questioning their faith in God's strength and power. "Do you really think that God is not capable of making me have a child? Do you think that he could only open Sarai's womb and not mine?" etc. and conclude with a statement of her faith, "God is the God of the universe and of my body and when it is His time, He will make this lovely thing happen. Until then, I choose to trust Him." <br /><br />Now, if they aren't believers, that's a whole other kettle of fish. Perhaps telling the story of Sarai and the story of Elizabeth and the story of Hannah and then telling them that her God is a God of miracles in His own time and she is content waiting on Him." That might give her more opportunities to share her faith, but it also makes her have to respond instead of just melting into the woodwork. <br /><br />Being an MK, I'm not quite a squeamish about personal space/topics as others, but I do get shocked by their wives-tales sometimes. God is the God of that too, and many times it can be used to show Christ to the people around me. <br /><br />Beth (from Mexico)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-47451635928345067292012-09-20T19:42:21.593-06:002012-09-20T19:42:21.593-06:00Thanks for your input. I don't believe she is...Thanks for your input. I don't believe she is in any way against going to a doctor. Hopefully she will see this and consider this option for communicating that she'd rather not hear about it. The thing is that I get the impression she honestly doesn't care if fertility is delayed as long as God is in charge. That's the part people don't "get" somehow. Hopefully I am not misrepresenting her side of this.Jamie Johttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04168408977811339924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3241703702485132991.post-27430122571122412092012-09-20T08:05:57.562-06:002012-09-20T08:05:57.562-06:00Is she against going to a doctor? Seems to me tha...Is she against going to a doctor? Seems to me that seeing one might not hurt and does not need to take glory away from God, but might help them formulate an answer to people. Usually after a few years, a visit to a doctor is not unusual. It may also help relieve some of the "stress" of the general community because they might then perceive that she cares (not saying she doesn't!! but realizing that other people may think she doesn't as doing nothing can be misunderstood as not caring). Then they can say, "we've seen a doctor, we thank you for your prayers, but all this attention to it is causing me stress and the doctor is very specific about not adding stress. He thinks if I don't have to carry everyone's worry, my chances are greater, so I'd thank you to keep your worries, remedies,suggestions, prayers private and let me relax."Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com